Game 3: South Korea vs. Greece

South Korea 2 - 0 Greece

In the Nelson Mandela Stadium, which was half full, it was as loud as ever, thank again to the................(you guessed it) Vuvelzas. Truth be told, I wasn't looking forward to watch this and I was right fr a reason. This was not an example in ball retention, perhaps even the polar opposite to Barcelona.

South Korea was busy, frantic and pressuring like much Asian sides. Greece had a piss-poor defence, in contrast to the winning Euro 2004 team. They were clearly looking for a set piece to make something happen, but it was the South Koreans who scored from a set piece in the 7th minute when Ki crossed it to the poorly marked centre backJung Soo Lee who headed it in.

Greece then started to slowly come into the come midway through the first half. They kept looking for the long over the top effort, but this new ball doesn't suit that game. South Korea had a good game plans with their spritely wingers.

The game plodded along til half time. After the interval, in the 53rd minute Park Ji Sung seized upon the hopeless Vynta's error and doubled Korea's lead. From the 60th minute onwards, the game petered out big time, with both teams tired!

Player Ratings:

South Korea:

GK 13 Jung - 6.5 - Took charge when needed, Not much to do.

RB 22 Cha - 6.5 - Bald, Quiet, tested at start against Samaras, made few runs up the right.

LB 12 Young-Pyo Lee - 6 - Quieter then counterparts, but solid.

CB 14 Jung-Soo Lee - 8 - Got early goal from free kick, and handy at centre back aswell. Man of the match.

CB 4 Cho - 6 - Not tested. Lost position a small bit.

RM 17 Chung Yong Lee - 7 - Very busy like the rest of the South Korean midfield, drew a yellow card from Torosodis.

LM 7 Ji Sung Park - 7 - The captain was not his busy self in the first half, but seized upon Vyntra's error, rode a couple of chances and had a well taken goal in the second half.

CM 8 Jung Woo Kim - 7 - Kept midfield ticking over. Subbed.

CM 16 Ki - 6.5 - Had assist for first goal, got tired as match went on.

SS 19 Yeom - 7.5 - Great runs from industrious striker. Hard to mark, played in the hole.

CF 10 Chu Young Park - 6 - Spurned a few chances, smart movement!

Subs:

CM 5 Kim Nam Il - 6 - Disciplined Job in central midfield.

CM 13 Kim Jae Sung - N/A - Time wasting sub.

Greece:

GK 12 Tzorvas - 5.5 - Made a good save in the 22nd, but not as good as his George Clooney lookalike predecessor.

RB 15 Torosidis - 5 - Got a yellow card in second half and did not much else.

LB 2 Seitaridis - 5 - Dragged around too easily, yet tried in vain!

CB 8 Papadopolous - 6.5 - Tried to be solid but let down but his centre back partner!

CB 11 Vyntra - 4 - Shite-est player on the pitch by far. Sole cause for second goal.

RM 7 Samaras - 6 - Good in first half, didnt even look like the useless Celtic / Man.City player, soon reverted to that, but giving ball away ALOT. Was subbed in second half.

LM 10 Karagounous - 6 - Perhaps the system didn't suit him, had to drop deep to receive ball.

CM 21 Katsouranis - 4.5 - Didn't even see him to be honest.

CM 6 Tziolis - 5 - Didn't see him either.

CF 17 Gekas - 5.5 - Tried but is horrendously slow.

CF 9 Charisteas - 5.5 - A frustrated figure, eventually subbed.

Subs:

CM 3 Patsatzoglou - 5 - Featured as much as the man he replaced.

CF 20 Kapetonas - 6.5 - Tried alot, but surrounded by ineptitude. Spurned Greece's best chance late on.

Game 2: Uruguay vs. France 11/06/2010

Uruguay 0- 0 France

Lodeiro after his sending off!

Well that match the 'le poo'. I'm not gonna even write that much about it, but fair play to the French, they've discovered time travel because they brought me right back to the 2002 world cup perfromance with that insipid performance.

In the RTE studio, we had the dream team of Giles, Dunphy and Brady!! Domenach suffered character assasination in there, even though it is well warranted (especially after hearing from Darragh Maloney that he dropped Robert Pires a.k.a GOD, because he was a scorpio!)

So onto the match. In the weeks leading up to the world cup everyone was saying 'they can't be that bad, look at their squad'. Well I looked at their squad and tonight, they WERE that bad. Curiously leaving out Malouda!???!!

In Cape Town, Uruguay had France number easily. Yet, it was the under pressure France team who had the clearest chance by far in the 7th minutes when winger Sidney Govou side-footed a Franck Ribery cross wide with the goal gaping.

Uruguay played the last nine minutes with 10 men after substitute Nicolas Lodeiro's dismissal for a second yellow for a DUMB tackle on Sagna.

In the 89th minutes, France had appeals for a penalty dismissed when Thierry Henry's stab towards goal seemed to hit Victorino's arm. This is how dour the game was if thats all I've to write about.

For a third World Cup in a row, France failed to win their opener.

Player Ratings:

Uruguay:

GK 1 Muslera – 7 – Not really tested apart from a few average free kicks. Did what he needed to do.

RB 6 Victorino – 7 – Kept very narrow, and marked Ribery out of it!

CB 2 Lugano – 6 - Made a few slips and errors, but good in the air. Not an inspiring captains performance.

CB 3 Godin – 7 - Seemed to spend much of the first half clearing up the mistakes of others, with a couple of fine saving tackles when the Celeste looked in trouble.

LB 11 A. Pereira – 7 – Did well with Govou, quietish game but that's a testament to his performance.

CM 15 Perez – 6 - Very busy, tough tackling, battle with Toulalan was good to watch. Bit limited in his play.

CM 17 Rios – 6.5 - Broke up French play well, marked down for a girly dive!

RM 16 M. Pereira – 6 - Pined back by Sagna, better after half time, not threatening really.

LM 18 I. Gonzalez – 6 - Subbed after 60mins, one of the reasons, Sagna enjoyed his game.

CF 9 Suarez – 6.5 - Was fouled alot, but no one really got to see what all the talk was about him.

CF 10 Forlan – 7 - Uruguay's best player, Good shot in first half and generally led his team by example.

Subs:

CM 14 Lodeiro – 4 - Idiot, sent off for stupid challenge!

CF 13 Abreu – n/a – Not enough time to do anything.

FRANCE:

GK 1 Lloris – 6 - Good save from Forlan in 1st half, but quit game from then on.

RB 2 Sagna – 7 - Solid and encouraging play from the Arsenal man. One of France's better players.

CB 5 Gallas – 6 - Couple of dodgy moments from Billy, struggled with the ball but regained composure.

CB 3 Abidal – 6 - Another unspectacular game from a Frenchman, maybe I should just start copy and pasting.

LB 13 Evra – 7 - Booked for a tug on Perez. Wasn't really pegged back as ever, but got forward muc much more in the 2nd half.

CM 8 Gourcuff – 5.5 - Good set pieces, bad passing, rightly subbed in second period.

CM 14 Toulalan – 7 - Toulalan looks quare old, but his performance was anything but old aged. Very energetic and broke up play alot. Perhaps inevitable he was booked.

CM 19 Diaby – 7 - For some reason he was picked here, probably because of the Malouda Domenach spat. But for a man, who in my opinion shouldn't have been in the squad, he was quiet good, able, busy and productive. My man of the match. (no biase here!) Not as good after half time though.

RWF 10 Govou – 5 - Missed an easy chance from six yards in first half, onomous the second half!

CF 21 Anelka – 6.5 – Very iolated up there, but worked his grumpy socks off.

LWF 7 Ribery - 6 - Very in and out performance by scarface, just like his whole season has been really.

Subs:

Henry – 6 – Perhaps unlucky not to get a penalty at the end of the match.

Malouda – 6 – Nothing of not e done by this man, but can be forgiven because of Domenach.

Game 1: 11/06/2010 South Africa vs. Mexico

Match Report:

84,490 people crammed into the stadium today, for the kick off of the 2010 Fifa world cup. It wasn't a capacity crowd, but it sounded like they enjoyed themselves (fecking vuvelzas!!)

The game started off tentatively, but Mexico began to spread the ball around well. It was a very slow start by the host team. But George Hamilton was well ahead of the action, thanks to the fast commentary or slow pictures, whatever way you choose to look at it! From the very start, it was apparent there was a French director in charge of televising it to us saps, with the crappy, slow motion, pointless replays. They soon faded away, thank god.

For the first 10 minutes, South Africa didn't get anywhere near the ball. They decided to go with long ball tactics to Mphela who willingly chased down everything. Mexico on the other hand were spreading the ball round very well with neat touches. Also, from the beginning of the match, it was quick to see the problems with new new much maligned ball, as it had some unnatural bounces off the ground.

Mexico almost immediately targeted South Africa's weak left back. They were also pushing their opponents high up the pitch. The first threatening set piece was in the 16th minute, but Stephan Pienaar put it well over. South Africa eventually started to come into the game, but for some reason, completely ignored their right side flank for attacks. Poor Modise and Gaxa.

South Africa had a few glimpses of light, but they weren't getting Tshabala on the ball nearly enough for their liking. Both teams were very focused on counter attacking.

The Bafana Bafana's centre backs weren't really tested as Mexico's attacks came from the flanks. Around the 30th minutes, Dos Santos and Vela switched flanks and the move nearly payed off immediately. After some great dribbling by Vela he put a lovely ball in for Franco who was unfortunate not to score. From a corner, Carlos Vela then had a goal correctly ruled out for offside in the 38 minute after Khune came charging out like a madman. South Africa then started growing again, but half time had arrived upon us.

Following half time, South Africa picked up where they left off and started stronger then their opponents. At this stage, Mexico seemed apprehensive / cautious.

Then, in the 54th, we came across the first goal off the 2010 world cup :D and what a goal! Modise played a 1-2 with Dikgacol in midfield, and then proceeded the play a lovely ball into Tshabalala's path who rocketed a shot past the flapping Perez. If the goal was good, the celebration was even better, with some great choreography by the whole team. Bit too staged perhaps?!!

Then the game fell flat again for a while, even though Mexico were flat since half time. Then around the 60th minute, Giovanni Dos Santos, from the right hand side, unleashed a shot destined for the top corner until Khune made a fantastic stop. The Vuvelza's were blaring at this stage (unfortunately). In the 68th minute, South Africa had a peno shout, but I wouldn't have given it, when Rodrigouz edged Modise out of the way.

Around the 68th and 72nd minutes, Mexico became desperate and brought on 2 strikers, the 37 year old Blanco and Hernandez. The tie, slowly started to turn, but Mexico weren't getting close to the goal. In the 78th minute Mexico scored after South Africa switched off from a short corner. As their defence pushed out, they left 3 Mexicans unmarked at the back post and Gurado found Marquez with a pinpoint cross.

After their goal, the Mexican players had their tails up for a short while and started pressuring the tired South Africans, but in truth both teams were tired and the game petered out as South Africa went the long ball route and it nearly payed off in the last minute when Mphela hit the post from a Khune long ball.

Player Ratings: South Africa:

GK 16 Khune 6.5 Always looking for quick distribution, Great save from Dos Santos in the 60th minute.

RB 2 Gaxa 6 Grew in stature as game went on, made few forays forward in first half. Ambitious shot in the 80th minute.

CB 4 Mokoena 6.5 Held good line with Khumalo all game, had a few good challenges

CB 20 Khumalo 6 Very quiet in comparison with his defensive partner, but made a fantastic challenge on Hernandez in the 84 minute.

LB 15 Thwala 4 Worst player on pitch by far. The Mexicans targeted him all the time he was on the pitch, slung his hook at half time and quiet rightly too.

LM 8 Tshabalala 8.5 Man of the match. Brilliantly taken goal and a great dance followed it :) South Africa didn't get him on the ball nearly as much as they wanted in the first half. Also nearly set up Mphela in first half.

CM 13 Dikgacol 5.5 Earned a yellow for foul on Dos Santos, Had a header in first half, nothing else of note really.

CM 12 Letsholonyane 5 Quiet game, or disciplined game depending on your point of view from the Kaizer Chiefs man, in the holding role, with the fine head of hair.

RM 11 Modise 7 Had a low key first half, when he was caught offside a few times. But grew as the game went on. Set up Tshabalala for the goal with a nice ball.

AM 10 Pienaar 6.5 Enthusiastic and industrious as ever in the first half. Was always looking for the ball, but ran of of steam badly in the second half. Subbed for Parker in 83rd minute.

CF 9 Mphela 7 Like a South African version of Kevin Doyle, never stopped going, running all across the front line. Very unfortunate to hit post in last minute.

Subs: LB 3 Masilela 5.5 Came on for the terrible Thwala, but didn't really press a claim for a starting role next game. Received a yellow for foul on Juarez.

CF 17 Parker 5.5 Little time to make an impact

Mexico:
GK 1 Perez 5 Typical Latin goalie. Small (5'9'' I heard) and flapped at a couple of crosses, quick off line and not great feet.

RB 12 Aguilar 7.5 Best player by far in first half by far I thought, with loads of energy up the right wing. Subbed for some reason in 2nd half. Maybe injured?

CB 2 Rodriguez 6 Quiet game for both centre backs, but slightly more active then Osorio as he was the starting point for Mexico's adventures up the pitch.

CB 5 Osorio 5.5 Marshaled well with Rodriguez, but to be honest, didn't notice him much
.
LB 3 Salcido 6 Lost position a few times in first half, could have been in trouble if South Africa actually chose to go down his wing once in a while. Good feet at times though.

CM 16 Juarez 5.5 Received the first yellow card of the 2010 world cup, for a harshish handball call. Did feck all else tho.

DM 4 Marquez 8 Disciplined in the holding role, perhaps too deep sometimes. Yet had good distribution and scored the vital equaliser.

CM 6 Torrado 6 Started the game with great energy but the 31 year captain, inevitably ran out of steam. Was booked for challenge on Dikgacol.

RWF 17 Dos Santos 7 Most active player on pitch, often switching wings with Vela. Dropped deep to receive ball and dribbled at opponents fearlessly. Nearly scored a cracker in 2nd half.

LWF 11 Vela 7 Kicked around a bit at the start, but he should be used to it. Came into game when switched to left with nice runs and passes. Had goal ruled out for offside from corner in 1st half. Ran outta juice and subbed for Branco.

CF 9 Franco 6 Had a couple of poor headers and did nothing else of note apart from early chance in 32nd minute.

Subs:

RM 18 Gurado 6.5 Did shag all apart from the cross for the equaliser. Twas a good cross though.

CF 10 Blanco 6.5 The 37 year old looked cack when he first came on, but he started to look busy and actively seeked out the ball to make things happen.

CF 14 Hernandez 5.5 The new Man.United man didn't do much apart from a good chance in the 84th minute. I expected him to start, to be honest.

The Jersey World Cup!! (Knock Out Stages)

So who's made through to the knock out stages?? Here's the list:

• South Africa
• Nigeria
• Algeria
• Ghana
• Germany
• Slovenia
• Argentina
• France
• Cameroon
• New Zealand
• Portugal
• Spain
• Slovakia
• Holland
• Honduras
• Ivory Coast

Last 16: 1. Winners Group A (South Africa) vs. Runners Up Group B (Nigeria)

South Africa's easily beats the dull Nigeria away who was quiet frankly lucky to make it the knock outs after being here by strong home. 2. Winners Group C (Algeria) vs. Runners Up Group D (Ghana)

Algeria are, perhaps, very unfortunate to be knocked out at this stage but their weaker home jersey were drawn against a very strong Ghana away jersey!!
3. Winners Group D (Germany) vs. Runners Up Group C (Slovenia)

Early upset here as Slovenia's green away jersey, easily takes Germany's solid white home effort!
4. Winners Group B (Argentina) vs. Runners Up Group A (France)
Argentina's same as ever sky blue and white stripes, JUST takes France's white away on penalties! 5. Winners Group E (Cameroon) vs. Runners Up Group F (New Zealand)

In the toughest bout in the last 16, New Zealand's all black away effort, takes Cameroon's solid home fitted green effort. 6. Winners Group G (Portugal) vs. Runners Up Group H (Spain)

Portugal easily takes Spain's boring navy effort with the nice red top. 7. Winners Group F (Slovakia) vs. Runners Up Group E (Holland)

Unfortunately Slovakia's boring blue home scrapes by Holland boring white away, expect the winner of this, not to make it to the semi's!
8. Winners Group H (Honduras) vs. Runners Up Group G (Ivory Coast)

No contest here, as the best jersey in the competition, Ivory Coast away beats Honduras's nice white effort. Quarter Finals:

A. Winner match 5 (New Zealand) vs. Winner match 6 (Portugal)

The white of Portugal takes the white of New Zealand in this all Nike tightly fought battle.
B. Winner match 1 (South Africa) vs. Winner match 2 (Ghana)

Tough all African, all puma, all fitted, all tight rippling bod.........whoooooa!!!!! Better stop it there and just say I went for South Africa's yellow jersey here. C. Winner match 3 (Slovenia) vs. Winner match 4 (Argentina)

Extra time and penalties eventually separated these teams, as Argentina's neat blue number slays the Slovenians valiant white effort. D. Winner match 7 (Slovakia) vs. Winner match 8 (Ivory Coast) No surprises here as the much maligned (by me) Slovakian effort is defeated by the much praised (by me) Ivory Coast super duper best jersey ever. Semi Finals:

The Semi Final line up.

i. Winners match A (Portugal) vs. Winners match B (South Africa)

In perhaps what should have been the final line up, the favourites take on the host (a draw which aways seems to happen at some stage) it's the Portugal red home lining up against the South Africa green away, Cristiano's chest out Portugal team just edge it. ii. Winners match C (Argentina) vs. Winners match D (Ivory Coast)

In the weaker of the two semi finals, the white (probably from Diego's coke habits) and light blue had no chance without help from strong blue away effort, was helpless against the Cote D'Ivoire's green and puma kit.

Third Place Play Off:

Loser Match I. (South Africa) vs. Loser Match II. (Argentina)

In a decent match up, the hosts, South Africa's decent yellow Bafana Bafana Adidas jersey take third place ahead of Argentina's blue.

The Final:

Winner Match I. (Portugal) vs. Winner Match II. (Ivory Coast)

The Final Line Up

A rematch from the group of death, group G match. So here it is, the poster boy of African footie, Didier Drogba versus the poster boy (in his own head) of world football Cristiano Ronaldo,the winker. Who will be victorious? Okay, okay, whilst I declared the whole tournament, that Ivory Coast's away was by far, the best kit in the tournament, but in all good conscience I couldn't give them the champions status with such a weak home kit, so the deserving world champions of the world of the world of the world are Portugal with their two strong Nike fitted jerseys. Too bad they'll be cack in the real thing! :D

The Jersey World Cup!! (Group Stages)

Hello again, today's entry, will be the, as already stated in the title, Jersey World Cup! 'Ill use the fixtures as already listed in the official fifa website, with the team on the home side wearing their home jersey and the team on the away side wearing their away jersey. Simples!!

GROUP A FIXTURES

• South Africa vs. Mexico: South Africa
  
• Uruguay vs. France: Uruguay
  
• South Africa vs. Uruguay: South Africa
  
• France vs. Mexico: France
  
• Mexico vs. Uruguay: Mexico
  
• France vs. South Africa: South Africa
  

Final Standings Group A:

1. South Africa 9
   
2. France 3
3. Mexico 3
4. Uruguay 3

South Africa, comfortably top the group with their 2 bright strong Adidas jerseys. The Bafana Bafana look favourites to me at this early stage :P In a tie for second place, I opted for France, because of their strong home kit.


GROUP B FIXTURES

• South Korea vs. Greece: South Korea
  
• Argentina vs. Nigeria: Nigeria
  
• Argentina vs. South Korea: Argentina
  
• Greece vs. Nigeria: Greece
  
• Nigeria vs. South Korea: Nigeria
  
• Greece vs. Argentina: Argentina
  

Final Standings Group B:

1. Argentina 6
   
2. Nigeria 6
   
3. Greece 3
   
4. South Korea 3

In not the most inspiring group of jerseys, Argentina's jerseys send them top, the away is quiet nice. While they are not the best to look at from far away, but snazzy enough, up close. Nigeria grab second, despite a strong showing from South Korea's red top.

GROUP C FIXTURES:

• England vs. USA: USA
  
• Algeria vs. Slovenia: Slovenia
  
• Slovenia vs. USA: USA
  
• England vs. Algeria: Algeria
  
• Slovenia vs. England: Slovenia
  
• USA vs. Algeria: Algeria
  

Final Standings Group C:

1. Algeria 6
   
2. Slovenia 6
3. USA 6
4. England 0

In arguably the strongest group along with Group G (the group of death, in the real competition and this jersey farce). England have the two poorest plainest kits by far, while both Algeria and Slovenia's home and away kits are nice and fitted. In a 3 way tie at the top, USA lose out because of their ordinary white home kit.

GROUP D FIXTURES:

• Serbia vs. Ghana: Draw
  
• Germany vs. Australia: Germany
  
• Germany vs. Serbia: Germany
• Ghana vs. Australia: Ghana
  
• Ghana vs. Germany: Germany
  
• Australia vs. Serbia: Australia
  

Final Standings Group D:

1. Germany 9
2. Ghana 4
   
3. Australia 3
4. Serbia 1

Germany grab top spot here, because of a favourable job. Whilst their previous kits have been dull, this year there has been an added zest to the efficientness! While the 2 nicest jerseys in this group are Ghana's loud away and Serbia's red cross home design. Australia's away is worst by far!

GROUP E FIXTURES:

• Holland vs. Denmark: Holland
  
• Japan vs. Cameroon: Cameroon
  
• Holland vs. Japan: Holland
  
• Cameroon vs. Denmark: Cameroon
  
• Denmark vs. Japan: Draw
  
• Cameroon vs. Holland: Cameroon
  

Final Standings Group E:

1. Cameroon 9
2. Holland 6
3. Japan 1
4. Denmark 1

Cameroon trouncing the opposition with puma's patented fit design and vibrant colours. Both of Denmark's kits are poor as ever, almost just like the jersey's the had in the 1992 European championship, and whilst I'm a fan of retro styles, it fails here! Holland's home is nice, shame bout the away!

GROUP F FIXTURES:

• Italy vs. Paraguay: Italy
  
• New Zealand vs. Slovakia: Slovakia
  
• Slovakia vs. Paraguay: Slovakia
  
• Italy vs. New Zealand: New Zealand
  
• Slovakia vs. Italy: Draw
  
• Paraguay vs. New Zealand: New Zealand
  

Final Standings Group F:

1. Slovakia 7
2. New Zealand 6
3. Italy 4
4. Paraguay 0

Paraguay, miles off the pace here. New Zealand have clearly learned something from their rugby union brethren with the simple fitted design, which I quiet like. If Italy had stuck to their confederations cup jersey they'd be favourites here but alas, it's not to be! Slovakia, kind of win here by default! :(

GROUP G FIXTURES:

• Ivory Coast vs. Portugal: Portugal
  
• Brazil vs. North Korea: Brazil
  
• Brazil vs. Ivory Coast: Ivory Coast
  
• Portugal vs. North Korea: Portugal
  
• Portugal vs. Brazil: Portugal
  
• North Korea vs. Ivory Coast: Ivory Coast
  

Final Standings Group G:

1. Portugal 9
2. Ivory Coast 6
3. Brazil 3
4. North Korea 0

The Group of Death, just like real life North Korea are the whipping boys (also I must be given kudos for finding their jerseys with a hell of a lot of googling, thanks alot Kim Jung Il). Best jersey in the competition, according to me, is Ivory Coast's away. The home ain't so hot. Brazil's away finish was their ultimate downfall here, I've a feeling they tried to recreate their successful 2006 numbers. While Portugal have 2 very strong kits here, Favourites, in my eyes!

GROUP H FIXTURES:

• Honduras vs. Chile: Honduras
  
• Spain vs. Switzerland: Spain
  
• Chile vs. Switzerland: Chile
  
• Spain vs. Honduras: Honduras
  
• Chile vs. Spain: Spain
  
• Switzerland vs. Honduras: Honduras
  

Final Standings Group H:

1. Honduras 9
2. Spain 6
3. Chile 3
4. Switzerland 0

Poor showing from all the teams here, even though I must admit to liking Honduras's kit (also interesting denote, Honduras only team in the world cup with a third kit). Switzerland's kits are piss poor as ever, which is unusual for puma. Spain's worryingly are losing form just like their efforts in the last couple of years, which maybe why their successful on the pitch! Chile, nice but nothing special!

A taste of whats in store!!

The World Cup start in 2 days time in Soccer City, Jo'Burg with the first game being South Africa vs. Mexico. This will almost be certainly preceded by a long boring opening ceremony!!!

BOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Me, myself, am a man who has promised to watch and report on every game, thank god for sky plus!! My report will be simple and concise (hopefully), that will state the facts and talking points of each game. That's 64 games! (Hell yeah, I'm gonna watch Algeria Slovenia)! That's 96 hours not including extra time, penalties or sublime punditry from Giles, Dunphy, Souness, Okey Doke Bill, Lawrenson, Jug Ears Gary and whatever shite they have on itv!

Also I will give each player a mark out of ten and have a ref watch. No 3 yellow cards this world cup Mr.Poll! I'll report on it, like a pro :P, the best I can, with my bias and quick wit!! Hopefully I might even get a few followers, tell your friends, all criticism / feedback is welcome (as a hole in the head!).

Predictions Time, with my nads on the line!

Below at the bottom, I've copied and pasted the groups. So refer to them to see what I'm about (the world cup obviously!) Right first prediction, clearly the most important! Winners: Right I'm gonna be very boring about this but in my eyes it's either Spain or Brazil.

Pluses:Spain for obvious reasons. Favourites by far for the following reasons: Euro 2008 winners, Great team, Great football played by them, Good qualifying Campaign.

Drawbacks: Possible tiredness after long hard campaigns by Barca and Real and Athletico Madrid (which has the core of their squad, Different coach led them to glory in Euro 2008, Alot of players just coming off / affected by niggling injuries (Iniesta, Fabregas, Xavi, Torres)



Pluses: Brazil, on the other hand, haven't been flamboyant but they've been consistent, kinda like their coach Dunga. They've left home flair players (Ronaldinho, Pato, Fat Ronaldo, Fat Adriano) so their all business, no egos. They've had a good Qualifying campaign coming first, and not a bad Confederations Cup last summer.


Drawbacks: Maybe the reason I tip them, could put them out as well, what if there's no plan B. Alot of defenders are in the squad, what if they come up against another defensively resilient team. Brazil are also in the group of death, but I think they'll get through.

It must be noted that these teams could draw each other in the last 16, especially with Brazil in the Group of Death.

Top Scorer:

Luis Fabiano, for the simple fact that he's quiet handy and Brazil will be playing North Korea in their first game and they will WOMP 'em!!

Plus, I wouldn't be the biggest fan of the Portugal and Ivory Coast defences (more on them later).










Dark Horses:

I'm play the spread here, (Is that even the right term?), and pick three dark horses!

Contrary to what I just said, If Didier Drogba is passed fit, I fancy Ivory Coast to get far, even after a poor African cup of nations, but I think all the players in that tournament had their minds on the Togo tragedy. All the African teams will be fired up on their home continent.



Saying that, South Africa cannot be taken lightly either,in my opinion. I'd I'll definitely be wrong here tho. But nevertheless, while they have a tough-ish group, No-one can underestimate home field advantage, plus they looked to have some amount of character in the Confederations Cup (I know I keep referring to the Confederations Cup and the African Cup of Nations, just deal with it).



My last dark horse, USA saaaaawcer ball nation extravaganza! Good group players, good work ethic and seem to rise to the occasion (sometimes) They may even finish top of their group ahead of Eng-er-land!



Final Prediction, Two teams to advance from each group:

(Teams in bold to advance)

Group A.
France, Mexico, Uruguay, South Africa.

Even tho, I've backed France to come out of their group, I said I'd be controversial here. It Could be like 2002 all over again, but worse!

Group B.
Argentina, Greece, South Korea, Nigeria.

Argentina top, obviously but second is tough. I went for Nigeria because of a better known squad (Fickle I know) but its either them or South Korea, For the sake of football, I hope Greece don't get through.

Group C.
Algeria, England, Slovenia, U.S.A.

Engerland and my dark horses U.S.A here, because the other two are just bad!!

Group D.
Australia, Germany, Serbia, Ghana.

Very hard group this, Ze Germans will be efficient as ever, Aussies keep improving and are playing some nice stuff, Serbia are quiet strong, But Ghana are missing their most influential player and don't seem much without him.

Group E.
Netherlands, Denmark, Japan, Cameroon.

Netherlands for once, don't seem to have the blacks vs. whites fights this year (yeah i said it) and alot of their squad (except the backs) are key men for big teams in Europe. I'm picking Cameroon just cause I have a man love crush for Alex Song!!!

Group F.
Italy, Paraguay, New Zealand, Slovakia.

Italy, just cause they are the holders, not a great squad though. I just edged Paraguay over Slovakia, because they may be more used to the conditions in South Africa.

Group G.
Brazil, North Korea, Portugal, Ivory Coast.

Brazil (duh!), not North Korea (duh!) and not Portugal (because of a bad coach, bad qualifying campaign, never ever ever ever having an out and out striker and now Nani's just got injured). So Ivory Coast by default ;)

Group H.
Spain, Switzerland, Honduras, Chile.

Spain to win it, and Chile being the best of a bad bunch, unless someone who likes underdogs like myself can see Honduras doing something??!!